Success!

Today was my last HIIT workout of a 30 Day Challenge that I participated in this month... why is it a big deal?? I'll be happy to tell you... it's a big deal because I completed it. You see, "Pre-fitness journey Lori" MIGHT have started it but she would not have finished it. She may have had the desire to start but when it got hard (and this one was hard from the get-go) she would have quit. She would have lacked the drive and motivation that I have now. She would have come up with an excuse.... she would not have finished! This past 30 days has been a real challenge and I'm not gonna lie, the moves were hard (some harder than others, some of them I had to modify). There were days that I got out of bed and just didn't want to do it. There were days that I curled up in a ball, into the fetal position right there on the gym floor after I finished my workout for the day because that's just how I felt.... but the key word here is that I FINISHED it. I was successful and each workout, no matter how challenging it was for me, I felt GREAT afterwards! What a feeling that is!!

It's so important to not get caught up in the small stuff. Make a goal and reach for it. Actually, make small goals so you don't become overwhelmed! Last year, I set a goal for myself that may or may not have been realistic. I wanted to weigh "X Amount" by now (in time for my wedding in 2 weeks)... I wanted to look amazing in my wedding dress.... I read lots of success stories about how people lost 100 lbs in a year or less so why couldn't I do that too??! I didn't count on having knee surgery. I didn't count on being out of commission for longer than I had anticipated (another goal that I set that was a bit unrealistic). I didn't count on hitting a plateau that lasted months and months and months and becoming so frustrated that I gave in to more temptations that I normally allowed myself. I was jealous of those that were successful and I felt like I was failing.....

What I didn't realize was that I was losing body fat.... it's been a SLOW process but it's coming off. I didn't realize that I was gaining a little bit of muscle (which is another goal). What I didn't realize was how difficult it would be to build muscle and lose fat at the same time.... but I'm doing it!! I am strong and I am determined (and I'm a little hard-headed and stubborn).... that makes for a good combination :) I can do SO MUCH MORE than I give myself credit for and I'm ready to celebrate what I have accomplished and NOT what I have not accomplished yet!!! I have seriously kicked some major ass and I should be proud of myself!! No more saying "I've ONLY lost 65 lbs"..... instead, "I've lost 65 freaking pounds.... how awesome is that??" How many people can say that they have made a plan, set up goals and are actually working towards them? I can say that! No more saying "I need to lose weight" or "I need to get off my butt and go to the gym".... I'm doing it!!! I've got a plan and it is in motion! What happens when I reach a goal?? EASY.... I set another one! I just finished a kick ass 30 Day HIIT Challenge.... next week, I start a kick ass 90 Day HIIT Challenge!

I may not be where I want to be right now, I may still have a LOT of fat that I'm desperately trying to lose but I'm working my ass off. I have stuck to the meal plan that I set up for myself this week (by no means am I depriving myself either.... just trying to make healthier choices and plan ahead) and for the first time in a long time, I am really pleased with how I have stuck to it. :)

Not everyone will want to do a similar challenge I'm doing.... not everyone will want to do HIIT.... not everyone will want to get up and lift weights at 4:30 every morning like I do.... and ya know what??? That's ok. There are so many different activities out there and everyone should find the thing that they are passionate about and do it! Just move! It may not happen over night but it will happen as long as you don't give up!!!

Countdown to the wedding...

I have been slacking and figured it was time to do an update. You know, a "where is she now" sort of thing. Well... not a lot has changed to be honest. I'm trecking a long. I hit a plateau and unfortunately have been stuck for quite some time but I'm changing things up in hopes to get things flowing Don't get me wrong, I'm doing great. My workout outs are great, in fact, I just started a new challenge for the Month of May called the "Make Fat Cry 30 Day Challenge" and let me tell ya.... it was cryin' this morning for sure. There was actual proof when I looked down and saw a huge puddle of my own sweat!! Too much info? Sorry... that's just the way it is!! Good things happen to those who sweat.... For reals!

*Side Note* the challenge is totally awesome and I am just participating in it, I have nothing to do with it but I totally recommend it.... did I mention it was free?? What can you lose? When I signed up, I figured I'd get some good info from it but I have gotten far more. Bree, aka The Betty Rocker, is really awesome, she's extremely motivating and she does this to help out folks like me who are trying to get into shape. The registration is only open thru May 7 (that would be tomorrow)... so check out her page on FB or her website: thebettyrocker.com, there is a link to the challenge page and instructions on how to sign up.

Anyway, my eating has been decent but there is something that has been lacking and we can't seem to get it pin-pointed (not for lack of trying). Apparently, I'm just one of those people who struggles and it doesn't come off as easily as it does on some people. Does that bother me? Hell Yeah! I'm working my A$$ off here! Is there anything I can do about it? Yep.... education (specifically on nutrition) and keep on keepin' on! I can't quit... no, I WON'T quit. This road has been difficult and frustrating but giving up just is not an option for me. Not only do I do this to make myself better, to make myself healthy and fit, to lose weight/fat/inches ~ but I actually enjoy this!

The scale may not be moving right now but my body fat is definitely lowering (slow and steady) and my measurements seem to be shrinking (a little...finally)... so that's a good thing! I still have a LONG ways to go and I will reach my target at some point. I'm not going to reach the first goal that I set for myself. The wedding is in less than 40 days and I'm not where I would like to be right now but I have to accept that. Sometimes, it's easier said than done... but I just remind myself of JUST how far I have come! Hell, five years ago I was incredibly depressed, had been my heaviest and had just come out of a nightmare of a marriage (but I made it through that). Two years ago, I ended another relationship that to be honest, never should have happened and I refused to travel down an all too familiar path (but I made it through that as well). You know what I've learned? I've learned that I'm a pretty tough cookie...lol. I'm stronger than I thought and with the right people in my life (specifically Sam) that I have learned just how strong I am. We are going to have a beautiful wedding regardless of how much I weigh... we are happy and that is what is most important!

I might not be 140 lbs right now ~ but I will be. I may not be the size that I want to be ~ but I will be. I just have to have faith that all of my hard work and effort will get me to where I need to be. Sure, I am convinced that I would be farther along had I not had to have knee surgery (that really didn't do much good) and unfortunately, there will probably be more in my future but we will cross that when we get there. I have friends who have done a fantastic job and may be farther along in their journey but I am learning that we are all different. We can't compare ourselves to others. My journey began 16 months ago. I have lost 65 lbs and I am proud of that. I can do things that I just didn't think I could ever do. I will continue to focus on my health, on things that are sustainable while I am still enjoying my life because my friends.... Life is Good :)